Every Southerner secretly loves the North, it’s a grey and lonely holiday filled with cheap booze and language confusion. So as soon as the sun started to shine I invited Jordan Godwin, Jordan Okane and Harry Mills-Wakley to a week of meat pasties, train rides and the tender loving charms of the Ibis Budget. We had a vague plan – we would be based in Leeds and we would visit different cities via the Leeds train station. These cities or towns would include Sheffield, Huddersfield, Dewsbury, Bradford and other soul-destroying metropolitan utopias.

Each morning we would call into Greggs, and then make our way to the station and each evening we would wine and dine somewhere exotic, like Park Hill, Sheffieldwhere we ate chips on the floor while a small angry chap tried to stab the chip shop owner. I love the North, with its binge drinking and crap diets. I fucking love it.